This reminds me of this quote regarding feedback to someone: "there are no wrong words for someone who is ready to hear the message, and no right words for someone who isn't. "
"there are no wrong words for someone who is ready to hear the message, and no right words for someone who isn't. "
--> There's lots of wisdom in it. People who want to understand you will ask questions. Those who don't want to or are not ready... they may feel offended.
Of course it often helps to speak at least one more language besides your mother tongue. Because then you know that the words you choose can have different meanings, and also the words you receive could have different intentions. Benefit of the doubt is powerful source here.
I often wondered through my young adulthood “What am I doing wrong?” It wasn’t until my forties I realized I was too kind, to loving, too trusting to the wrong people. My kindness became an expectation to them and I was left empty as none was being returned. I did not stop being kind and loving, I simply walked away from the ones who thought my worth was only in what I could do for them.
Yes, some people take kindness and help of others for granted... almost like they are entiteled to it. And they don't even recognise. But there are people who can see and who value that... these are the ones you want to have around you. And they are probably as kind and warm as you are yourself.
Hmm, sounds like you have a closed minded neighbor like I do. I had seen the pattern developing but tried to ignore it. My favorite quote these days is from Maya Angelou "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time".
Probably there is reason why it's called a blind spot. I tried to softly point my neighbor's nose onto some topics and make here at least think a bit about why her son doesn't want anything to do with her... I gave her 2nd and 3rd chance.... because I know from myself how limited my awareness was when I was younger. But didn't work. Well, at least I tried so I'm free of regrets.
This reminds me of this quote regarding feedback to someone: "there are no wrong words for someone who is ready to hear the message, and no right words for someone who isn't. "
Not totally true, but you get the point.
I appreciate your heartfelt reflections.
"there are no wrong words for someone who is ready to hear the message, and no right words for someone who isn't. "
--> There's lots of wisdom in it. People who want to understand you will ask questions. Those who don't want to or are not ready... they may feel offended.
Of course it often helps to speak at least one more language besides your mother tongue. Because then you know that the words you choose can have different meanings, and also the words you receive could have different intentions. Benefit of the doubt is powerful source here.
I often wondered through my young adulthood “What am I doing wrong?” It wasn’t until my forties I realized I was too kind, to loving, too trusting to the wrong people. My kindness became an expectation to them and I was left empty as none was being returned. I did not stop being kind and loving, I simply walked away from the ones who thought my worth was only in what I could do for them.
Yes, some people take kindness and help of others for granted... almost like they are entiteled to it. And they don't even recognise. But there are people who can see and who value that... these are the ones you want to have around you. And they are probably as kind and warm as you are yourself.
Yes absolutely true.
I mumbled, nodded, smiled, remembered, frowned, related...
But above everything, I understood the spiral of my life. The ever-changing flow of everything I'm experiencing.
Thank you for this...
Welcome you. Next time I try to find words that massage ears and backs.
The spiral thing happened so often in my life and it amazes me every time.
Yes, one can never get used to it... It's unpredictably turning and twisting, both in time and situations
I enjoyed reading this post Tim, great musings.
Hmm, sounds like you have a closed minded neighbor like I do. I had seen the pattern developing but tried to ignore it. My favorite quote these days is from Maya Angelou "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time".
Probably there is reason why it's called a blind spot. I tried to softly point my neighbor's nose onto some topics and make here at least think a bit about why her son doesn't want anything to do with her... I gave her 2nd and 3rd chance.... because I know from myself how limited my awareness was when I was younger. But didn't work. Well, at least I tried so I'm free of regrets.
It’s taken me Avery long time to realize it wasn’t me. I was as around the wrong people. That still trips me at times. Thanks.
Yep, sometimes people around you don't want to see who you are. Then it can happen that you believe the version they see to be you.